Sunday Morning Bauble

Dear blaze (I am thinking of you as sparkler and neon, with a touch of a baton twirler’s sequined leotard glimmer),

This is not in response to your lovely and engaging post earlier today.  I will return to that later.  Instead, I offer a jaunt back to 1825 France, where the women wanted to gain weight.  I was perusing Brillat-Savarin’s “Advice to Women Who Are Thin,” and I wanted to share a few of its delights with you:

  • Apparently in 1825, women bought padding to put under their clothes to emphasize their curves, much “to the obvious horror of the prudish, who pass them [store windows selling these pads] by with a shudder.”
  • He notes that gaining weight is quite easy.  The more you eat, the less you exercise, and voila!
  • Each day should be started with soup and noodles or a good cup of chocolate in bed.
  • Then lunch “of eggs fried or scrambled in butter, little meat pies, chops, and whatever you wish. The main thing is that you have eggs.  A cup of coffee will do no harm.”:
  • After lunch, you are supposed to go shopping, and then visit a friend and tell them what you saw. “We hold that such conversation is highly beneficial, because of the great pleasure that accompanies it.” Holla! Millicent!
  • Then you eat a lot for dinner, with something sweet and starchy for dessert.
  • And then this very helpful guide to living “Sweeten whatever fruit needs it; avoid taking baths which are too cold; try to breathe from time to time the pure air of the open countryside; eat plenty of grapes in season; and do not exhaust yourselves by dancing too much at balls.”

Apparently, if we “follow this plan with care and determination, [we] will soon repair the ravages of nature; [our] health as well as our beauty will improve; sensual pleasure will profit from the two of them, and the Professor’s ears will ring agreeably to the music of grateful confidences.”

I don’t know who the professor is.  So, when all else fails, we have a plan!

More on miracles and the considerations of DFW to come,

Love (sparklers full),



One Response to Sunday Morning Bauble

  1. Millicent says:

    I never dance too much at balls. It’s slutty.

    Also: the Yahoo! headline right now is “Eat more to Lose More.”


    Off to eat eggs,

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